Karen: “I was so surprised that my son could already do this at the age of 1.5 years”

It all started at prenatal yoga. There I met another mother, Simone. Someone who always looked impeccable, even in her third trimester. We started chatting and what she said sounded almost too good to be true: “Babies are born potty trained,” she said, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. I nodded, but didn't think much of it.

Could it still work?

Fast forward to the moment when Julian started to walk. He was energetic, curious, and above all, stubborn. Changing diapers became more and more of a struggle. Each time I almost had to put him in a hold to get him clean. One day, I suddenly remembered Simone's words. Could it work?

Oh, why not? Trying doesn't hurt

I delved into the internet and read everything I could find on baby elimination communication. The concept was simple: you pay attention to your baby's signals, such as a certain look, a sound, or restless movement. Then you take them to a potty or the toilet and encourage them with, for example, a peeing sound. It sounded logical, but also incredibly intensive. “Oh, why not,” I thought. “If it doesn't work, at most I'm a few weeks further along.”

I will never forget the first time

The first time I tried it, Julian was sitting on my lap. I had placed a bowl underneath us because, to be honest, I didn't dare to put him on a potty yet. He looked at me in surprise when I made the peeing sound. Nothing happened for a few seconds, but then I heard the trickle in the bowl. I will never forget the way he looked. His face lit up as if he thought: “You finally understand what I want!” My heart melted.

Sometimes I completely missed the signals

From that moment on, I was convinced. Of course, it didn't always go smoothly. The first few weeks were mainly about experimenting. Sometimes he seemed to have no interest in cooperating, and other times I completely missed the cues. But after a few weeks, I began to understand better what he needed. For instance, I noticed that he often needed to pee after his nap. So as soon as he woke up, I took him to the potty. I made the peeing sound — a kind of soft “pssssss” — and most of the time it worked. He even seemed proud of himself. It was as if he understood that we were doing something special together.

On some days I thought: why am I doing this?

During the day I still used diapers, but more and more often they remained dry. I began to gain more and more confidence in the process. Even my husband, who was skeptical at first, started to see how well it worked. “He really is a smart little guy,” he said proudly when Julian used the potty for the first time without me having to remind him.

But to be fair, it was also tough. There were days when I thought: “Why am I even doing this? Putting on a diaper is so much easier.” Like that time we were visiting my in-laws. Julian had just eaten and suddenly started to squirm restlessly. “I think he needs to pee,” I said quickly, as I got up to take him to the bathroom.

“He will become potty trained naturally,” said my mother-in-law

My mother-in-law looked at me as if I were crazy. “What are you doing?” she asked in surprise. “I’m trying to potty train him,” I explained. “He gives signals when he needs to go.” She raised her eyebrows. “Oh dear, why bother? He’ll become potty trained on his own. It happens naturally when he’s four.” I felt my cheeks turn red. It wasn’t the first time someone had given me a strange look because of our approach. But I knew it worked, and that was all that mattered.

Only a diaper during a long car ride

Now that Julian is one and a half years old, he only wears a diaper for reassurance when we take long car rides. During the day and even at night, things almost always go well. It feels like we have achieved something special together. It has even strengthened our bond because I have learned to listen to him even better.

Some people look at me as if I'm crazy

When I tell other mothers about our experience, I often get surprised looks. Some look at me as if I'm crazy. But there are also mothers who become curious. And sometimes, just sometimes, I hear them say weeks later: “We tried it too, and it really works!” That might just be the best compliment you can receive.

KAREN